My brain is my constant enemy.
Always finding new ways to torture me.
Whispering lies that tear me apart,
killing my spark.
My own head is a war zone,
I don't want this nightmare to be my home.
Can I call truce with the voices in my head,
Instead of staying in this place I dread.
I want peace,
I want this attack to cease.
Cease fire please.
This battle is killing me.
Pulling me apart,
Tearing all the strings of my heart.
Unraveling me like thread.
My thoughts are slow, heavy like lead.
Words flutter through my head,
like "You're better off dead"
"You don't matter."
"You're crazier than the mad hatter."
My demons are loud
and I don't know how to tune them out.
I'm scared of losing my faith
Something that has always been safe.
I feel lost in the dark
fearing my sins have made an irreversible mark.
A red bloodied stain,
that has left the God I love in pain.
I'm trapped in my mind, my box,
The walls closing in, they won't stop.
There's a pattern of panic
In this mind that seems so manic.
I want to end the cycle of fear,
but I don't know how to get the other voice to hear.
The other me, the evil inside.
All my fear, Frankenstein monstered into something that no longer can hide.
It's a monster, full of rage.
A demon that has been around me since a young age.
I'm scared of it,
I'm hurt with every hit.
Every lie that it whispers to me,
I'm drowning, I can't see.
Could someone please help me?
I just want to be free.